Out of Mind Experiences

| June 13 2013
Burt Prelutsky

We have all heard of out of body experiences in which people claim to be hovering in the air gazing down on themselves.  But I think that it’s far more commonplace for left-wingers to take leave of their brains than their bodies.  I mean, how can people with even half a brain possibly condone the things they do?

Take same-sex marriages, for instance.  How such lunacy has come to be taken seriously as a civil right by so many on the Left makes you wonder if there is any goofy idea that these pinheads won’t promote, any silly slogan they won’t parrot.  Every time I come across one of these farcical “marriages” on TV, I am reminded of those stomach-turning “beauty” contests involving five-year-olds decked out in lipstick, rouge, tiaras and evening gowns; grotesque parodies of normal life.

Or consider that this administration is encouraging Mexican consulates to tell illegal aliens to demand food stamps from the U.S. government.  I’m reminded of a friend who wrote me to say that henceforth his unlicensed guns won’t be illegal; they will merely be undocumented.

Speaking of guns, Benjamin Franklin once wisely observed that “Those who beat their guns into plowshares will soon be plowing for those who don’t.”

Having now had several months to rue the last presidential election, I have decided there’s no big secret why 51% of the voters went for Obama.  It’s because more and more Americans are childish, if not downright infantile.  In a divorce, will the kids favor the disciplinarian who demands they complete their schoolwork and do their chores or the one who bribes them with toys and other goodies?  Americans should grow up, but it may already be too late to expect such an unlikely miracle.

As someone else pointed out, in the U.S., a 13-year-old girl is already an adult who can be trusted to buy the day-after pill off the shelf, but 26-year-olds are still children who must be covered by their parents’ medical insurance policies.

I know there are some people who hold Kirsten Powers in higher regard than her fellow left-wing propagandists because, on very rare occasion, she will acknowledge that Obama doesn’t walk on water.  I, on the other hand, find her usual expression so relentlessly smug, I have to assume she’s come to regard herself as being the prettiest woman in any venue in which she happens to appear.  Unfortunately, the venue in which she appears most frequently is Fox News, where the likes of Dana Perino, Kimberly Guilfoyle and Megyn Kelly, hang out.  So my advice to Ms. Powers is that she wipe that smirk off her puss.

Not since O.J. Simpson’s murder trial have so many shysters lined up to defend a criminal as have offered to help Dzhokhar Tsarnaev out of his legal difficulties.  Under our system, lawyers are free to defend whomever they wish.  But I would remind people that they have the right to shun and despise whomever they wish.

Frankly, I’m sure if there had been any law school grads around in ancient times, some latent ambulance chaser would have been only too happy to defend Cain.  Of course in the case of the Tsarnaev brothers, there is no Abel.  Instead, we have the disgrace of Cain and Cain.

Finally, in 1999, Al Gore augmented his salary as vice-president by selling cows off the family farm for $6,000.  Back then, he had a net worth of $1.7 million.  Today, 14 years later, he’s worth an estimated $200 million, thanks to the success of his global warming hoax.

To me, that simply proves that in America today there’s a heck of a lot less money to be made selling actual livestock than in peddling bull—-.

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